|
MY
BASICS |
|
I am a: |
A 32-year old common man |
|
Looking for
a: |
Common woman,
with uncommon assets |
|
Interested
in: |
Serious relationship based on mutual respect, friendship based on mutual respect, MASTER/slave relationship based on mutual respect |
|
Age: |
31 |
|
Location: |
Anywhere people are oppressed and rents are controlled |
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Height: |
Shoulder-to-shoulder with the working man |
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Weight: |
165 lbs in hemp jockey shorts |
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Hair: |
Parted on the left |
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Eyes: |
Focused on the big picture |
|
Occupation: |
Certified and bonded anarchist |
| Education: |
10-year professional student, Antioch
College |
| Ethnicity: |
WASP but my family traveled tourist class on the Mayflower |
| Religion: |
A totally bourgeois concept invented to increase tree sales during Arbor Day |
|
Star Sign: |
A totally bourgeois concept invented to increase pickup lines in bars |
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MORE
ABOUT ME |
|
Proudest
accomplishment
Unionized my parent's upstairs servants
Last great book I read
"Visit U.S.-Oppressed Countries on Four Dollars a Day" by Howard Zinn
Music that puts me in the mood
"Ukrainian Coal Miner Protest Songs, Volume 2." Talk about make-out music!
My perfect
getaway weekend
Being beaten senseless by riot policemen at an anti-globalization rally
The five items I can't live without
"Quotations from Chairman Mao," L.L. Bean gas mask, organic dental floss, my kick-ass dulcimer, my coffee mug shaped like William
Burroughs' spleen
Turn
ons
Sense of indignation,
semi-nude guerilla theater, group hugs at the food co-op, East German lingerie
Turn
offs
The military industrial establishment, talking with your mouth full of chemical additives, folk dancers who wear shoes, Ralph Lauren's
line of fall protestware |
|
EVEN
MORE ABOUT ME
|
|
At first glance I may appear to be like any other humorless neo-Marxist vegetarian, but I can assure you I am a unique individual who has much more to offer. Among my friends in the progressive "movement," I am known as an angry silent brooding soul with a lighthearted, devil-may-care sense of
joie d' vivre. I'm a true romantic who likes nothing more than stealing kisses at a rent strike or holding hands while dodging rubber bullets at an anti-IMF protest. |
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WHAT
I'M LOOKING FOR
|
|
I'm looking for a woman who truly seeks an equal partnership. Someone who is just as passionate about the causes in which I believe. I picture us stealing glances while being fire-hosed by a National Guardsman. Or writing poetry in a Guatemalan prison cell. I would value you as an individual and, before lovemaking, would insist that we sign a standard 32-page legal agreement stating that any and all physical contact between both parties is consensual. To state a physical preference on my part would be clearly sexist. However, I'd be less than honest if I said I've never fantasized about Betty Friedan in a halter-top. |
