Play by Play From a Player's Palm Pilot

Thursday

8:00  Tell the woman I woke up with I have to leave.

8:30  Go to gym. Try to get treadmill next to Wanda.

9:00  Go to work. Ask receptionist if she has a boyfriend.

9:30  Find out who I slept with last night. Call her. Tell her
        I'm thinking about her.

10:00  Find out the name of hot babe who runs the sexual
          harassment seminars.

10:15  Ask Jenny how her mother is coping with beri-beri.

11:00  Tell Jenny I'm there for her. (act concerned)

12:00  Just in case, make make motel reservation for Jenny and me.

12:15  Verify order on e-condoms.com.

1:15  Check match.com. See if anyone is available to fill 8:30 slot.

1:30  See if 9:15 date will meet me at 8:30. Then try and move
         the 10:00 to 9:15.

2:30  Call roommate. Make sure bras and panties are removed from
         all rooms.

3:00  Meet with Bill Gates. Go over merger plans.

4:30  Offer to drive Mrs. Gates back to hotel.

5:30  Call TGIF Fridays and get scouting report.

6:15  Meet Agnes (or is it Angie) to go over wedding plans.

6:30  Have bartender page me about an emergency at home.

6:45  Meet Sheila for dinner at the Outback.

7:30  Have waiter inform me that my brother was just rushed
         to hospital.

7:45  Meet Janis when she gets off her shift at Dunkin Donuts.

7:50  Drive her to the bus stop after we've had sex.

8:00  Meet the guys for a drink at O'Toole's. Try and get
         O'Toole's daughter's phone number.

8:30  Meet next date at TGIF Fridays. If she's decent, invite her
         to my car.

9:05  If needed, buy more condoms.

9:15  Meet next date at the other TGIF Fridays. If she's decent,
         ask if she's into a threesome with the 8:00 date.

10:00  Meet last date at O'Toole's. If she's decent, ask her to go
          back to my place. If she's not, tell her I'm in love with O'Toole.